Is your child working diligently to make you go crazy? Raising your kids can be stressful. One New York couple went as far as describing their decision not to have children as the best decision of their lives. Citing their friends as examples, they feel it's best to stay off this "absolutely terrifying experience." Children can indeed be a handful a lot of the time. And, your only hope for a breather is when they've all left the coop. Regardless of what many people think, you can learn to be calm, composed, keep your cool, and still live life at full crush. That's the goal of positive parenting.
What’s Positive Parenting?
The larger percentage of adults eventually become parents. Most of us will try, with bulldog tenacity, to be great parents. But our kids will inevitably create situations that confuse and frustrate us. No developmental stage is different – each one has its challenges.
A parent who prefers to avoid the potential problems within the territory of effective parenting needs to adopt an approach that focuses on happiness, resilience, and positive youth development. It's not just for mothers but addresses the influence of everyone contributing to the psycho-social well-being of a child.
Once you play a meaningful role in a child’s life, the more productive approach is to promote parenting behaviours that are most critical in fostering positive youth development. According to the Committee of Ministers of the Council of Europe, it is nurturing, empowering, and without violence. They also say it offers recognition and guidance by enabling boundaries that help the child develop fully.
Positive parenting involves an unbroken relationship between parents and their children(or child) while ensuring that the following are available:
caring
leading
teaching
communicating
consistent and unconditional access to the needs of the child
Ways You Can Use Positive Parenting to Your Advantage
#1 The Respect Principle – Adopt the Golden Rule
More than your child(ren), you know that what goes around comes around. It works in parenting too. Treat your child with the respect you want them to treat you. They'll return the favor. Not easy to admit, but children have an untainted sense of loyalty until they become adults (like us!).
#2 Treat Their Small Successes as a Big Deal
Positive reinforcement is a powerful tool to make your child repeat good behaviour. Of course, you should use it in meaningful ways. Always reward such behaviours by being thankful to them, praising them, displaying affection, offering more privileges, and so forth.
#3 Put Them in the Cockpit – Play Co-pilot
Offer two choices for positive behaviour to give your child a sense of being in control. Such trust is empowering. Try something like, "Tim, would you rather brush your teeth or take your bath first?”
Notice that the order of both choices here doesn't quite matter. Look for such non-critical parameters in presenting your options.
#4 Be Clear on Consequences
When your child breaks the rules, make sure they lose any rewards. So, they can't play outside if they don't finish their homework. Never let them negotiate their way out of such situations.
#5 Always Connect Before Correcting
Like every other person, children need love and care. It’s a staple ingredient for their optimal development. Take the time to build a bridge to your child by loving them and showing genuine care, before you attempt to address any behavioural problems.
Winning Together
Being a parent is work, but positive parenting makes light work of it. All you need is copious quantities of patience and learning to identify the many opportunities for practice. Instead of losing your hair when your herd misbehave, you can learn to meditate and enjoy its many benefits. With time, you will turn situations that seem to call for discipline into valuable learning for your kids.
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